The idea for today's post came from a TED talk I recently viewed, called "Take 'the other' to lunch" and available at the following link: http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/elizabeth_lesser_take_the_other_to_lunch.html I highly recommend it to supplement today's narrative.
For the purpose of this posting, I will define "the other" as a group or individual that you see as not belonging with your core group. Since the other is not you, it is often perceived as being less intelligent, immoral, and not worthy of the same human rights as you.
Unfortunately for humankind, treating the other as less of a human than oneself is a common theme throughout our history. Genocides, denying groups the right to vote or marry, race riots, and more are all extreme examples of "otherizing" that penetrate our societies. Taken to an extreme, considering people as part of "other" groups instead of as one of their own - global citizens - is very dangerous for our world.
Yet, treating a person or group as "the other" is not just a challenge to be overcome by the world's worst. It is something each of us must face, independently and as societies.
Here is a quick litmus test to see if you have "otherized". For people who do not have children, imagine that you do (or that these are your future children):
1. Have you forbidden (secretly or otherwise) your child to marry someone of another race?
2. Have you told yourself that you would disown your child if s/he came out to you as gay (or straight)?
3. Have you disowned or stopped talking to your family or friends because of their viewpoint on any issue, such as abortion or guns (or even favorite sports teams)?
4. Have you held someone to a different standard than you would yourself because of a group you feel they belong to?
5. Have you convinced yourself that life would not be worth living if you lived differently, such as if you were severely disabled or unable to provide for your children?
I could go on and on with questions, but these 5 shall suffice.
If you answered "yes" to any of the above questions, then you are actively placing people around you in a group outside of your own. It is time to get working on eliminating "the other" and bringing those people into the circle of "my own".
In my opinion, "otherizing" is a way of breaking your integrity. Each of us grows up and acquires values - bases for ethical action and prioritization. We each hold different values, which is why integrity differs for each one of us. I will define integrity as living by your values. However, I will say that a universal value is that humans wish to be treated by others fairly, with full human rights, care, respect, and love. Treating anybody other than yourself differently from this is a huge breach of these values - and is exactly what we do when we "otherize".
I appreciate the concept that Elizabeth Lesser talks about in her TED talk: taking someone from your perceived "other" group to lunch. Doing so will not intrinsically change you, but it will change your view on people that may not be your clones. People have their views and live their lives for a reason; it is important to ask why before passing judgement.
Eliminating the concept of "the other" is a huge focus in Periclean Scholars. From the very beginning, with reading and research, to setting foot on the ground in the country of focus, we are taught and challenged to believe that different cultures and groups are not inferior, nor better - but that they are different. There is a lot we can learn from each other, but ultimately we are all global citizens striving to make better lives for ourselves, our families, our communities, and our planet.
There were many facets of my Zambia experience that could have made it easy for me to place the entire nation into the "other" category. To name a few, 15% have HIV and/or TB; women wear chitenges instead of shorts in very hot weather; and Zambian Catholics have vibrant services. These are some defining characteristics of people that I saw and interacted with, but they do not make them more or less worthy of human rights, care, respect, and love. I will say, though, that getting to know people that live differently - having that "lunch" that Elizabeth Lesser talks about - helped me to eliminate any sort of concept of "the other" that I might have carried over with me from the US to Zambia. The other might have come with me, but my inner circle came back with me.
We all want our children - the people most in our inner circle - to be proud of us. Yet, counterintuitively, the most productive way for us to accomplish this goal is by working with, treating, and believing in people very different from us as we would ourselves. Periclean Scholars helped me to realize this.
This is reason #7 to support Periclean Scholars: eliminating "the other".
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